4/14/08

Jeff gave me a really nice leather journal for Christmas and after three months since my last entry this is what I wrote.....

"I really want to journal. It's just easier to blog. Typing is faster and it has spellcheck.

I wonder which is more telling though....AND....if I ever have grandchildren who read this...or my blog...if it is still out there in cyberspace...which will they find more interesting? I don't USUALLY list the details of my daily life in my blog...or my spiritual frustrations...or my daily hiccoughs with my children...well....not DAILY.

So how best to approach "The Journal" after three months of not writing in it?

I'll start with why, after so long, I picked it up in the first place.

I felt compelled to list the desires of my heart.

Well, let me back up a bit. I was reading Oswald Chambers and I didn't like it!! It begins.... "Whom the Lord loves He chastens . . ." Hebrews 12:6 How petty our complaining is!"

ARRRGGGG!!!!

I just told Jeff the other day, "I can't believe God's STINKING plan is for us to stay in Colorado so that we can live in poverty!"

Yes, I said "stinking"...and as I look back....sitting in the bottom of the shower, soaking wet, was probably NOT the best place to risk being struck by lightning.

ANYWAY...OC goes on to say, "Where do the saints get their joy? If we did not know some Christians well, we might think from just observing them that they have no burdens at all to bear. But we must lift the veil from our eyes. The fact that the peace, light, and joy of God is in them is proof that a burden is there as well. The burden that God places on us squeezes the grapes in our lives and produces the wine, but most of us see only the wine and not the burden. No power on earth or in hell can conquer the Spirit of God living within the human spirit; it creates an inner invincibility."

So now...if God's plan ISN'T for us to live in poverty...which my wonderful husband ASSURES me is NOT the case....and He truly DOES care about the desires of my heart I will now list them here. Not as some spiritual "wish" list...but as a reminder to ME as to what is REALLY in my heart...because I am fairly sure that God already knows...and I believe that if they are there, HE PROBABLY placed them there before I was born."

HA...and that is where I will leave off sharing with you my lame attempt at WRITING...WITH A PEN...ON PAPER. You don't need to know the desires of my heart. I will tell you there were three...

and then it did kinda turn into a wish list ending with wanting chickens and my desire to lose 100 lbs.

God knows the difference between my desires and my wishes though. And I know which is which because the important ones have NUMBERS in front of them!!